And now it's time ... to be less productive, to take it easy, to realise that being busy is not necessarily a good thing. It's time to not jump up and offer to do things, to not feel guilty if you are seen to be sitting and daydreaming, or reading far too much of a book in one sitting ... and to never apologise for doing what you want to do.
I've spent my whole life being productive, you have to be when you're a young Mum, then you get a job and juggle the home and the work life. You learn to fit so many hours into your minutes, to keep everyone as happy as you can and you do learn to love the busy-ness of it.
But then the kids grow up, the career takes off and you are busy for other people, you realise this and sidestep and become busy again but for yourself. It's all good in it's time, but now I am in a different time, and I have to learn to love it.
So bit by bit over the course of the last few months, I have been turning things off, unsubscribing, unfollowing, blocking ... and walking away.
It's been a slow, gradual process and I will not be made to feel guilty for doing less.
When you do less, you are more.
Time to think is a precious resource.
Sue xx
I could have written this post myself-totally agree. ❤️ Catriona
ReplyDeleteCould not agree more. The Italians have a saying "bel far niente" , the beauty of doing nothing is my rough translation.
ReplyDeleteI loved this post Sue, and hope I can follow these thoughts myself - we are all too hard on ourselves at times aren't we x
ReplyDeleteAlison in Wales x
A beautiful post. Many thanks.
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts exactly. I read, do my quilting, hand sewing, people watching, or absolutely nothing but sitting in the sunshine, I do it for me. Do I feel guilty? not on your life. Patricia
ReplyDeleteOh how this resonates with me Sue! I've done a lot of unsubscribing to emails, blocking nuisance calls etc to give myself a bit of peace. I still have enough to worry about with my 19 yr old Granddaughter being constantly ill and unable to see a consultant, so I don't want to cope with extraneous matter as well. I like nothing better than to sit reading a book or listening to calming music with a glass of wine or hot cup of tea in my hand. The TV stays off until I feel I can cope with the news for half an hour.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy your 'time to think' my friend. I hope you are well x
This was good for me to read today . I have had two long term friends cut contact with me because I have changed so much since Tony died . I no longer want to go out to the pub for boozy meals , and not do I reach for the bank card to pay ( I can no longer afford it ). I feel overwhelmed often , and need to do less . Their abrupt departure from my life feels like another bereavement, and I lurch between feeling sad and angry . I am not the person I was when Tony was alive . I will never be that person again . And true friends would I think see that
ReplyDeleteSiobhan x
Not for the first time my dear, you have stopped me dead by writing about the contents of a corner of my brain. 😘
ReplyDeleteI think I have finally worked out that I am now of an age where I can damn well please myself and if those around me are not pleased with that they can go off somewhere else :-) It is quite liberating, xx
Well done Sue, yes learning to say no is an acquired thing!
ReplyDeleteI agree with every word. I have learnt to say no at 78 years young and I have decided it is my time now. Yes I felt guilty at first but not anymore.
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful post Sue, thank you. When I retired four years ago after working just over fifty years full time, my dear sister (who hardly worked a few years) said to me ‘you will have to find a hobby and keep busy or you will go daft’ - charming girl!! Anyway your post resonates precisely and I am guilty of now not giving a damn, shed a load of crap and am enjoying doing whatever direction the day takes me, bliss xx
ReplyDeleteI have gotten much better at saying No lately, still there are times I know I should say that word and don't. I think doing my projects and sitting in the sun is a wonderful way for me to relax and think.
ReplyDeleteGod bless.
I love to sit out in my conservatory with a good book a cup of coffee and only birdsong for company. I am now tue master of saying no. Took me a very long time to reach this stage.
ReplyDeleteI reached a certain age when I decided I was old enough to say NO, unfortunately people are so good at making you feel guilty:(
ReplyDeleteAgree completely with your post.
ReplyDeleteI finally found the right words to say NO to something I've ( quite reluctantly ) agreed to do for years.
I opted for "I'm afraid I've decided I need to stop ..."
That is such a good phrase. I might use it myself sometime :)
DeleteIt took a while to come up with, PP.
DeleteI hoped by implying it was a hard decision the people asking me would see my stopping as reasonable. In fact the relief is palpable!
Sue, I was just thinking back to when my mind began to feel so cluttered and it was right around the time of social media. I no longer had the capacity to read long articles...one because social media teaches you to read in snippets and two...because it was all so overwhelming and way too much to process. Now, all these years later, I wish we would have all said no to facebook and the rest and just stayed the simple people we were.
ReplyDeleteSo what I'm trying to say is that I love this post! We become healthier when we can turn off, block, unfollow, etc., and just free our minds to think again.